It's All Greek to Me

You knew that heading was coming.

I try to learn a little of the language of the place I'm visiting before I go, which is one of the things that causes me to shy away from China and India. The languages seem much too daunting for me. Greek was also daunting because, well, it's a whole other alphabet! The pain is a little eased by the fact that it is related to the Roman/English alphabet (referred to as "English" for ease), or more properly our alphabet is related to it. In fact, Greek was considered the first true alphabet because it was the first to have symbols representing vowels. It has not changed much over the years, centuries, or millenia. It was fascinating to see old grave markers and other written items (generally not documents as the Greek climate is not amenable to the preservation of papyrus and paper) that have the exact same letters as the road signs of today.

Anyway, I had all sorts of good intentions about learning some Greek. I bought a course with a handbook and CDs. I lasted about two lessons. When I found that nouns come in four cases--nominative, accusative, genitive, and vocative--I gave up. I know, I have no fortitude. I studied Latin in junior high and I know it has the same sort of issues going on, but frankly I'm pretty sure I didn't understand the intricacies of its grammar back then and I *really* don't remember it now. My excuse is that I moved from California to Texas in the summer between 9th and 10th grade and because of different curricula in the states there are some things I missed out on in my education, including reading Dickens (which I eventually got around to on my own) and diagramming sentences (which I never got around to). I love words, reading, and writing (the latter being obvious from the voluminosity of this blog), but my formal grammatical knowledge is not as strong as it probably should be. Presumably I should be able to easily identify something genitive with a hearty "it's-nothing" chortle. I can't.

And thus I was defeated by the nominative, accusative, genetive, and vocative cases.

One thing I *did* do, which I can't recommend highly enough, was thoroughly learn the alphabet. It's not that hard, I promise. OK, it's kind of hard but if you give it five or six hours (not all at once) you'll get it. Upper case is easier because the letters bear more resemblance to the letters of the English alphabet; the lower case letters are trickier. The good news is most road signs use the upper case. The bad news is that not all of them do and you really can't get away with only learning upper case. I learned the letters, practiced writing them, practiced their sounds, and learned the tricky combinations. For instance, the letter beta makes a "v" sound, not a "b" sound. To get a "b" sound you put mi and pi together (μπ), but only at the beginning of a word. If the combination appears in the middle of a word it's generally pronounced "mp" like we would (e.g., amplitude). Delta is pronounced as a soft "th" dipthong, not a "d"; to get a "d" sound you combine ni and taf (ντ). There are a few more, but these were the trickiest to me. Then I worked on reading words. It was slow going at first, but after a bit of practice I gained a reasonable facility. This helped not one iota with comprehension, of course, but if you can read a menu item you can pronounce it and order it. If you can read what the next city is you can figure out where you are on a map.

Here is a basic Greek alphabet link, with upper and lower cases, letter names, and pronunciation, including the ability to play the sound. This link has an interesting feature--it shows you how the upper and lower case are hand-written, and gives a pronunciation.

I also tried to memorize the numbers 1-10. The challenge with that is that several of them vary according to the gender of the word they are describing. I got a little bogged down in that (as I knew there was no way I'd be able to memorize the genders of words). This link conveniently does away with that ambiguity and presents one number, one word. That makes life easier. I'm not going to tell you which ones are gendered.

As my trip got closer I felt guilty about my paltry effort, so I went to the library to see what kind of tapes I could get. DC Library's collection is not the most up-to-date, but they had a Pimsleur course with 4 CDs that I loaded onto the mp3 player I bought just for the occasion (I'm not a very gadgety person). Pimsleur is convenient because it is all audio, so I could do it while walking back and forth to work. The lessons are 30 minutes and my walk is about 25, so it worked out perfectly. However, Pimsleur has very limited vocabulary. Very. No grammar. And is not particularly tourist oriented. For what it does, which is teach you a few specific phrases, it is very good. The interactive format requires you to answer questions and do rapid-fire translation, which is very engaging. The 12 vocabulary words on the tape I learned quite well (Ok, maybe there were closer to 30). For the most part they were useless, though I did once get to use "Thellate;"/"Then thello, efharisto" ("Do you want it?"/"I don't want it, thank you.")

If this resource is available to you at your local library, I recommend it. If you don't have a library card, get one! Most libraries, even DC, now have online libraries where you can virtually check out audio books and movies without leaving the comfort of your home. There was a Greek vocabulary set available online that I checked out, but it was a bizarre and useless quick recitation and translation of random words, with "soothing" background music that I assume was somehow meant to stimulate the memory portion of the brain. I guess it was produced before Baby Einstein was discredited.

To my totally untrained ear, the Greek accent is a bit like Spanish, especially in the sound of the "r" (there is no rolled "r" in Greek, however). I wonder if this is due to Moorish influences in both regions. Of course, I pronounce every foreign language with a Spanish accent because it was the first foreign language I studied, back in high school when my mind was still plastic and receptive to new languages. I really do believe there is something to learning a language when you're young. Too bad the window on that closed long ago for me!

One of the hard things about Greek pronunciation is that the stressed syllable is often the last and words often end in a vowel. In English we have very few words that end in a stressed vowel. The words for please (parakaLO) and thank you (efhariSTO) end with stressed vowels.

When I got on the plane I suddenly started to get very worried about how little effort I'd put into the language. I had my little phrasebook/dictionary so I knew that in the worst case scenario I could pull it out and haltingly communicate. But that wouldn't be the optimal way to spend a vacation.

I need not have worried! Everybody speaks English, and I do mean everybody. It's not just that all the Greeks speak English to the American and British tourists, which they do. It's that *all* non-Greeks communicate with Greeks in English. A French person is thirsty? "A bottle of water, please." A German wants to go to a museum? "One ticket, please." An Italian wishes to buy some stamps? "Four, please." Apparently English is the new Esperanto. It's quite humbling to realize that this essentially means that English speakers are the richest (making it worth it to learn English) and laziest (making it necessary to learn English) peoples on earth. I felt guilty taking advantage of everyone else's hard work to learn English, but it did make things easy.

We only ran into a few people who didn't speak fluent and flawless English, and pidgin sign language was just fine. The farmer from whom we bought grapes and figs made a "ssss" sound to indicate we could use his outdoor sink to wash our fruit. The garage station attendant held his hand waist high to indicate half-full, shoulder high to indicate full. We wanted full. Store clerks showed us the receipt with the printed total to tell us how much we owed. When you're using gestures to communicate, remember that in Europe 1 is a thumbs up; 2 is thumb and pointer; 3 is thumb, pointer, and middle; and 4 is the same as American (thumb turned down, four fingers up).

I think the Greeks are so used to speaking English that they don't even realize when English speakers make an effort. At the first few restaurants we went to I tried to order in Greek. The waiters feigned incomprehension. My accent is not anything like a real Greek person's, but it's not *that* indecipherable. I gave up and switched to English. In Athens, which has a more tourist mindset than elsewhere, the waiters were gracious when I tried to order dishes by their Greek names.

All in all, I ended up using only five Greek phrases consistently:
Kalimera-good morning
Parakalo-please/you're welcome
Efharisto-thank you
to loghariazmo-the bill
imei hortofagus-I'm a vegetarian

I also had occasion to use:
kalispera-good evening
kalinichta-good night
signomi-excuse me
yia sas-hello/goodbye

I didn't have to say even once:
then katalaveino-I don't understand
then milao Ellenika-I don't speak Greek

I got the most mileage out of asking for the bill in Greek. In the food section I described the Greek restaurant experience, which involves asking for the bill at least once and often twice. Saying it in Greek made me feel culturally sensitive rather than rude (asking for the bill in DC can be rude). It also netted me a lot of smiles and an offer for free wine!

You'll still need a phrasebook to muddle through the occasional menu. They're all translated into English, but some of the translations are puzzling and the phrasebook helped. I had the Lonely Planet phrasebook, which was small enough to carry in my nighttime purse and is worth the price for the hilarity of the "Sex Phrases" section alone, which teaches you how to say both "It's my first time" and "Will you marry me?"

A TINY LANGUAGE LESSON

I am in no way qualified to offer a language lesson. My only qualification is I'm doing it for free. If you can figure out how to download the podcast to your iPod, have at it.

You can find lots of more comprehensive language lessons on the internet. The BBC has excellent traveler/beginner lessons for many languages, including Greek. However, I didn't find the Greek as useful as the Italian had been; it jumps immediately into complicated sentences and you must first learn the alphabet and pronunciation on your own. The sentences are too complicated to actually retain for longer than it takes to go through the unit and its quiz. Though I got 5/5 right on most of the quizzes, it didn't significantly increase my knowledge of Greek. It is fun nevertheless, with lots of pronunciation to listen to.

No means...yes?

Yes and no, very basic language building blocks, and easy, right? No. Or do I mean yes?

Yes is Nai.

No is Ohi, sometimes transliterated Okhi.

So yes is no, and no is OK.

I tried to get these to feel right in my mouth. I practiced saying "ohi" while frowning and shaking my head. I practiced saying "nai" while smiling and nodding. Eventually I got Ohi to feel right because at least it has the same vowel as no. I tried to get Nai to feel right by rhyming it with "yeah," but it really doesn't. It's just "Nay." I never did get used to Nai meaning yes. Hopefully you'll do better than me.

Greetings

As in most languages, there are many, many ways to greet someone in Greek.

Allegedly, "Herrete" is the all-purpose greeting. The Pimsleur tapes were big on Herrete, and the other tapes I listened to also purported that this is the all-purpose greeting.

These people have never been to Greece.

I *never* heard it on the street, ever. And I traveled through a fair bit of the country so I don't think it's a regional thing. I tried it out a few times to gauge reactions and did not get an enthusiastic response. I mean, people knew what I was saying but they didn't say it back. If you say Kalimera to someone they will always say it back.

Another all-purpose greeting, one that is actually used, is "Yia sas." This is less formal than (the alleged) Herrete, like Hi as compared to Hello. It comes in two forms, "Yia sas" and "Yia sou." Like many languages, Greek has a formal and an informal "you." Yia sas is the formal (and the plural) you, Yia sou is the informal you. As someone coming from a language without a formal/informal you, I have never had a handle on when the informal is appropriate. It is my philosophy that you can't offend by being too respectful--think of how awesome it was when you were a kid to get a card addressed to Ms. Such and Such--so I just skipped Yia sou altogether.

Good morning is Kalimera, and it is liberally used. Say it with a smile to the people you pass on the street (within reason of course) and you'll get a smile and a greeting back.

Good afternoon is the dreaded Herrete. I just didn't say anything in the afternoons.

Good evening is Kalispera, though it is used less often than Kalimera. It's a nice way to greet the host of a restaurant before you ask if you can sit.

Good night is Kalinichta. I had occasion to use this only with hotel front desk personnel, but maybe you'll have a more amorous adventure than I. The Lonely Planet phrasebook will come in handy if you do.

Niceties

Please and you're welcome are both "Parakalo."

Thank you is "Efharisto." I never got a good pronunciation on this one. It is sometimes transliterated "Efkaristo," and I couldn't work out whether the "k" was added to make it easier for the English speaker to pronounce, as "h" is not a hard consonant for us. I was understood either way I pronounced it.

Signomi means both "excuse me" and "I'm sorry."

Eating and Drinking

You can always order your food and drink in English with no trouble. If you want to get fancy you can order your Greek salad as a "horiatiki," your water as "nero," and your wine as "krasi." Ouzo, luckily, is the same in both languages.

At the end of the meal, ask for "To loghariazmo, parakalo." You can even get really fancy and say "Signomi, to loghariazmo, parakalo."

My specialized phrase, which I made sure to learn very well, was "Imei hortofagus," I am a vegetarian. it was understood by everyone I said it to.

Language Barriers

I didn't run into any language barriers, and if you don't stray too far off the beaten path neither will you. Nevertheless, you can tell someone you don't understand Greek, "Then katalaveino Ellenika," and ask if they speak English, "Milate Anglika;" In Greek, a question is signified by a semi-colon and officially the question mark doesn't exist. I saw it used everywhere, of course.

Smile and Nod

If you're at a loss, just smile. Smiling is universal, and universally appreciated.

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